When people ask me what I’ve learned from years of coaching agents, leaders, and founders, my answer is almost always the same. Everyone just wants to be seen and heard. They want to matter to someone or something. They want connection and purpose, and to know they’re not invisible in the rooms they walk into every day.

What’s interesting is that when I’m asked about the most common obstacle real estate agents face, the answer is just as consistent: asking for business. Agents dread the calls. They avoid the follow-ups. They overthink outreach until it becomes easier to do nothing at all. And I don’t think that’s a coincidence.

Here’s the tension I see over and over again. Agents want to feel seen and heard, yet they hesitate to reach out because they’re afraid of bothering someone. Afraid of sounding salesy. Afraid of being too vulnerable. Afraid of needing something. So they stay quiet.

But what if we’ve been framing this all wrong?

What if reaching out isn’t an imposition, but an offering? 

Real connection doesn’t come from perfectly worded scripts or clever follow-up strategies. It comes from presence. From curiosity. From being willing to ask someone how they’re actually doing and then listening long enough to hear the answer.

Here’s the reframe I want to offer you this week. It might actually be your responsibility to reach out. To be the person who asks. To be the one who remembers. To be the steady point of contact when life gets busy, messy, or overwhelming. Not to sell. Not to pitch. But to connect.

When you show up with genuine interest, you give people something they’re quietly craving anyway: attention without agenda, care without pressure, and a sense that they matter. And yes, business comes from that. Referrals come from that. Trust grows from that. But those are outcomes, not the point.

The point is relationship.

So if you’ve been avoiding your calls or pushing off outreach, don’t ask yourself, What should I say? Ask instead, Who could use a moment of being seen today? Then reach out. Ask about their life. Listen carefully. Let it be simple.

So let me offer you a different way to think about this. What if reaching out isn’t just your prerogative, but your responsibility? In a world that’s increasingly busy, distracted, and disconnected, choosing to check in, to listen, and to stay in relationship is a meaningful act. It preserves something human. It keeps the heartbeat alive. And in a profession built on trust and connection, it’s not extra. It’s the work.